Sunday, August 30, 2009

Who are we hurting?

I'm sure a lot of you are tired of hearing about this, but since this horse isn't dead, I'm going to get my own kicks in until it is.

For the past two year I have run the Beginning Lolita, Advanced Lolita, and Lolita on a Dime, panels at Nebraskon, Otaku Omaha, and Anime Central, not to mention the convention I have been scheduled at and unable to attend. I have a lot of experience with helping new and questioning Lolita's start on their beautiful paths. I feel it is my duty, as the more experienced Lolita to help them out.

New girls aren't going to know the rules right off the bat. It's not like the knowledge is downloaded into our skulls the moment we decided to get our first frilly dress or Bible. We learn as we go. Trial and Error.

Where does it say in the handbook that we can't wear poka dots and stripes? I'd like to point out that Angelic Pretty has done it. Please note, I didn't say they did it well, but they did it, that lots of girls bought the dresses and skirts and socks in all of the bright pastel colors and shocking red it came is and no one said boo about it. Why? Because it was Brand and Brand can do no wrong....

Is this fair? That Brand can get away with such ghastly coordinates and yet wearing the wrong socks with an otherwise lovely outfit can get you slandered on anon picture posting sites. It's grossly disrespectful and I think it's time for it to stop.

I think new ideas should be embraced and celebrated! Sure, an Iowa State patterned Lolita outfit isn't the best Idea, we all know it, but it's not my idea to judge. I don't have to wear it. It's someone else's idea and good for them for thinking outside the small box the Lolita Community has made for it's self.

I take pride in helping any Lolita that asks for coordination advice or hair help. Gentle nudges are what the community need, not cliff like shoves.

Remember, Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. It's not our place to tell someone else how to wear their outfit, it's our honor to suggest matching nail polish and shoes.

We were all new once.

Monday, August 24, 2009

The Grey in a Black and White World

In the past week I have noticed something about myself that I thought I'd talk about this week. My thoughts on the subject being that maybe there are a few of you out there with the same problem.

I am a full time Lolita. I love waking up in the morning and pulling out a cute frilly skirt for the day. I love doing my hair and deciding what nails to wear for the day, I love it all. But lately I found myself curbing my exuberant Lolita lifestyle due to the hawk like disapproval of my family, my mother only included due to my non working-ness at the moment.

It's a terrible feeling to be beautiful for the day and then get a look that silently screams 'Seriously?' before we go out for the day. In the beginning she didn't care that I'd gotten into the style, in fact she wanted to start wearing it to, but as time went on, she became more and more disgruntled at my expensive habits.

So this week I'd like to share with ya'll a few ways I've found to keep my Lolita lifestyle, while still conforming to what she and the rest of my family feel I should look like while at the grocery store...

When you wake up in the morning, instead of reaching for the marshmallow cereal and the coke you hid at the back of the fridge, or cup of coffee if that's your thing, try taking the extra effort to cut up you favorite fruit and have a yummy fruit salad. For a little extra fun, try carving the less squishy fruit into fun shapes, or getting small cookie cutters and shaping them that way.

Wear a night gown with a ruffle around the bottom to bed, or a cute patterned pants set if you like. Never forget that you asleep for at least eight hours a night, shouldn't you be as pretty in sleep as you are when awake?

Make a little time in your day for tea. It doesn't have to be a lavish affair with bone china and silver sugar cube tongs, but a cup of your favorite tea does wonders for ignoring the world for a few minutes. If you have the time, have it in your favorite tea cup.

Want something a little more off the wall? How about flower arranging? Go to your local supermarket and pickup a bouquet of flowers. It can be any kind, from roses to carnations, but having bright sweet smelling flowers around will allow you to see your creation every time you pass it.

I hope these small activities help you keep the feeling of Lolita in your life, even if you are feeling leery about wearing your fluffy dresses and tea party replicas or if you're new to the style and don't have a large wardrobe built up yet.

Remember. You hold the key to your happiness. No one else. If you don't like the situation, change it.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Little cost, great fun!

Well it's the middle of a new week my lovelies and that means that it's time for a new post!

This time I was planning to talk about books and give some suggestions on maybe forgotten or over looked books to read when you feel like getting all dressed up to your Lolita nines, but have no money to actually go do anything, but like most things in life, this to has changed. Instead I'd like to impart a few low cost activity ideas for meet ups. These ideas are great if you're alone too, especially the second one.

Have you ever had to skip out on a outing, be it Lolita or other wise, because there are imaginary cobwebs in your wallet? We've all been there. It's even worse when you're the one that planned the event or came up with the idea to go and you're the only one that can't go. Yeah...been there too, but don't discard your plans for the gathering just because of a little financial bad luck.

So you can't go to the zoo because the cost of getting in to see animals for the day means you won't be eating for a week, don't be afraid to mention this to your hostess and give another suggestion for a gathering place or another date for another meet up. Your host/hostess doesn't have to take your advice, it's there choice, but at least you put the idea out there and who knows, there might be more people who were unable to attend due to their own personal issues that would be able to make the next event.

Do you know of a beautiful church in you area? Churches are great places for photo shoots and if you are respectful, the priest and nuns don't mind if you take pictures inside the cathedral.

Take a sketch book to your local park and draw what you see. This is a great idea for a meet up as well. Tell the girls to bring something to draw with and pair everyone. Take turns drawing each other! It's a great way to break the ice with new members of the group that you've never actually met before.

For a little bit of fun that you don't have to leave the house for, how about making a couple pots of tea for you and your guest and a good book? Each guest can take a turn reading a chapter or two from a collectively agreed upon title already in your collection and no one is left out. After the meet up, post discussion questions to your Livejournal, or any other journal/forum you'd like, from the material and invite everyone who attended to comment.

I hope these few ideas inspired you for your next gathering.

Until next time remember, you don't have to speand yourself into the poor house to have a good time. Sometimes the plainest ideas can be the most fun!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Starting Small

Since this is the first post to my new blog, I'm going to be talking about how to start out your Lolita wardrobe.

But first, food for thought.

When I started I cheated, I'll admit it. I didn't research and look over every brand piece and then save and save and save until I had -just- enough money to squeeze my dream dress into my budget. I took my GLB to my seamstress and showed her a picture and handed her five yards of fabric I got on clearance at JoAnn's. But by doing this, I discovered that I could wear my dress every week if I wanted to and then just toss it in the washer. No harm, no foul.

Sure, Lolita is about being pretty and feeling beautiful, but if you have to dry clean your dress before you wear it and keep it in a plastic covering to keep even one piece of pet hair from getting on it, is the style 'fun' anymore? Seems like work to me.

So I started making all of my cloths out of simple cotton and eyelet lace. Don't get me wrong, I love getting all gussied up and looking my Loli best, but when I'm just running out to the store for milk and eggs, or going to the mall, I'm not going to put on my Metamorphose Dress and fear being spontaneous and accepting an invitation to go to the park or out to walk around down town. I mean, god forbid anything happen to my Brand, right?

Instead I have everyday skirts and Walmart shirts with eyelet around the bottom hem for cuteness. I love the freedom the casualness of non-brand. I never hesitate to hold a melty ice cream cone or go paint pottery and hey! I look great while doing it ^_~*

Ok. On to my wardrobe tips.

If you're just starting out, make sure your first piece is something you can wear and coordinate with at least two other items in your closet, whether the items are strictly Lolita or not. You're spending a lot of money on your Lolita cloths, make sure you can enjoy them. There is no point in having something if it just sits in your closet and does nothing but look beautiful, but sad.

Skirts are good starter pieces. They can be matched up with five dollar T's or nice long sleeved shirts, ruffles not required.

Blouses are another good starter piece. Just like any other shirt, your brand blouse can be paired with jeans and a nice headband. Throw a simple black vest over it to give your starter piece a whole new feel. From sweet to classic in one move ^_^

If you'd rather start smaller, you can never go wrong with a headdress or a pair of socks. They usually run any wear from fifteen to thirty dollars, depending on the wear if you're getting them used, and always brighten an outfit when worn.

I'm going to end my first post with this. Fashion should be fun -and- functional.

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